Time Travel

The tide abides for, tarrieth for no man, stays no man, tide nor time tarrieth no man

I ground the beans, the fresh aroma of fragrant dark roasted arabicas filling my nostrils. I heard no sound from the bedroom whose silent occupant must still be sleeping soundly. The sky was beginning to brighten outside, ever so slightly. My phone vibrated, I looked at the message “Hey sorry, got alittle tipsy and my phone died.” I felt a tinge of sadness at what could have been, she was a beautiful girl and I’d been talking to her the better part of six months off and on. Still, it was hard to feel sadness at the events of last night and the morning up to that moment. I left the coffee maker to its work as it started to growl and steam, walking to the bedroom, I stood in the doorway for a moment, taking in the scene: a beautiful girl wrapped in sheets and blankets, just one arm and a perfect leg dangling out, breathing silently. After having met Sierra that one day in town, I had never fathomed that she would be there in my bed at that moment.

Life comes in bunches for me. No idea why. One day, or one week, no contacts, the next my inbox overflows. Like that one time when my wife was out of town, nothing until the last two days, then it was both Anne and Sierra. Pure insanity. Why can’t these events form an orderly queue instead of coming at me all at once? So, I never mentioned the third girl while my wife was out that one time. She was kind of an older version of Elle, we’ll call her ‘Ry’, early twenties, Anne’s age. She was very pretty, strawberry blonde, cute round face, thin with nice curves, captivating blue eyes. We talked a lot, she had a boyfriend, we agreed to meet a few times, but she stood me up. While my wife was gone, I messaged her a couple times to see how she was. The night I was to meet Anne, my phone lit up with this message from Ry:
“Hi Jason”
“Hi Ry, how have you been?”
“Good thanks, what have you been up to?”
“Not much, been enjoying some downtime with wife out of town. How about you?”
“Nothing much just enjoying some time off from work. I see from your messages you still think about me? 😊”
“Yes, from time to time 😉. Seems the feeling is mutual?”
“I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t 😊”
“Glad to hear it, up to anything tonight?”
“Out with friends at the moment. How long is the wife gone for?”
“She’s back tomorrow 😞 I’m at home frantically trying to get the house out of bachelor mode. How about later tonight?”
But, she went silent after that. It was alright since I had plans with Anne that night, and they ended up coming to fruition. And then Sierra happened. I got that text from her the next morning as I was making coffee. I wonder what would have happened if Ry’s phone hadn’t died, if she had texted me later in the evening after Anne had left. Would it have been her instead of Sierra? Or perhaps both? Of course, after having had an amazing time with Sierra, I was determined to see her again before my wife came home the next day. I had to let Ry go, it was either her or Sierra, and I didn’t even know if Ry would stand me up or actually meet.

I said life comes in bunches for me, right? Today and yesterday are the days of what could have been. Yesterday, a girl I was interested in told me she found someone else (I was too late, I wasn’t ready the last time we had talked). And today I messaged Ry in the morning, she got back to me, she’s found someone new as well as of a little over a week and a half ago. I can’t blame either of them, I would have done the same in their place. I have no right to feel any jealousy, but I have to say that I do, it is quite consuming. But, how could one as faithless as I, complain? Best not to think about what could have been, but look forward to what could be. I needed to get this off my chest, let it out, quench the fire of envy and regret in my belly before it eats through my lower intestine. I wonder if space-time is really curved as they say. Perhaps if it intersects itself at any point then I could be with other girls I’ve desired but it just “wasn’t in the cards” at the time previously. Even better, if only I could time travel, walk between the curves of the snaking fourth dimension at will. Of course, if time works this way, then I might end up in a situation like my day dream the other day, where I’m brushing my teeth in the bathroom and I hear the shower come on and peak in to see myself with my arms around a naked Sierra, “psst, can you guys keep it down in there” I try to get myself’s attention as my wife walks in and asks why I have the shower on as Sierra lets out a soft moan from behind the curtain. I guess we should just appreciate linear time for what it is.

Hey, speaking of space-time, remember the 80’s? Yeah, me neither.

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7 thoughts on “Time Travel

  1. Ah, the what if game. I play that a lot myself. Can’t go dwelling on it for too long though. It is what it is. I believe you’ll find yourself another Sierra. We are hard to come by. She reminded me of myself at that age. Completely reckless but I guess that’s what attracted you. Plus brown eyed girls are kinda irresistible. Haha. I do get what you mean about the jealousy part though. I would feel jealous if any of my affair partners would be involved with someone else. I have no right to be jealous because I’m the girl who is fucking multiple men but I mean jealousy is an ugly thing. It’s normal to feel jealousy, just don’t go crazy on me, alright? Haha.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, there is certainly something appealing about another Sierra (maybe without her being a such a blackguard), but I’m open to anything. And yes, I’m a sucker for brown eyes, especially with brown hair, not sure why.

      Yes, I don’t mind jealousy in a partner, as long as it doesn’t drive them to do something rash. And I hope they feel the same and trust that I may feel jealous, but I’m not going to try to hurt them or stalk them or anything of the sort. I’m just going to sit there and swallow it.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. It took me a bit to really embrace that is ok to be jealous. I used to boast that I wasn’t a jealous person but that all changed with Salvation — it’s funny how things change when one person truly gets in your head (and heart).

    So be envious of that guy and that it’s not you that’s with them instead… I think something better is just around the corner.
    🙃🙃🙃

    Liked by 1 person

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